write about the love story of a postgraduate student, Talatu John, who
got married to the man who infected her with HIV.
on June 24, 2016. It was five months to her wedding. Thirty-year-old
Talatu John (not real name), a postgraduate student of a university in
the North, woke up feeling disturbed.
collect the result of the HIV/AIDS test I did, the result showed that I
was positive. I began to cry in the dream and many people tried to
console me,” she said.
Indeed, she had gone for a HIV test but was yet to get the result. When
she went to collect the result of the test on the day of the dream, it
showed she was HIV positive.
correspondents, “What pains me most is that my boyfriend had the virus
but never told me. We were having unsafe sex regularly.
despite the fact that he truly loves me. I saw it in my dream, but it
has become a regrettable reality.”
former was searching for a job at a government agency in the state
capital. Before long, they fell head over heels in love.
love was so strong that I gave him all my heart. We had unprotected sex
at different times. I was so much in love that I never cared whether we
used a condom or not. I was not even scared of being pregnant. He too
never bothered to use a condom.
and he never told me. Later, my sister, a nurse, told me she learnt
that he (Emmanuel) is HIV positive and that I should search his room.
She gave me the name of the drug he was using. But I never found any.
In order to be sure I was not already infected, I went for HIV/AIDS test
and it showed that I was negative. That calmed my nerves.
getting regularly sick. I used to feel hot and tired easily. After
repeated medications for malaria, I didn’t get better. Then I started
depreciating in size. I was advised to go for HIV test.
result to me and told me to see the doctor. She raised my curiosity when
she told me she couldn’t tell me the result. The doctor then dropped
the bombshell. I was devastated. So, in anger, I went to confront my
boyfriend with the news but he denied.
had already made arrangements for our wedding. It was a day before we
went for counselling at the church that he told me the truth. Sometimes,
we quarrel over this and I used to call him the ‘devil.’ But he kept on
in Lafia, the Nasarawa State capital, Talatu took a bold step and
demonstrated that true love keeps no record of wrongs when she got
married to Emmanuel at a lavish ceremony attended by our correspondents.
consented to the wedding because both of them are HIV positive. The
church was filled to capacity as well-wishers, family and friends of the
couple attended the occasion.
flowery gown, the couple wore infectious smiles while the event lasted.
In his goodwill message for the groom and the bride, the officiating
minister (names withheld), urged them to always be patient with each
other and avoid third party interference in their marriage.
whatever God provided for them and learn to tolerate each other, saying
such an attitude would go a long way in ensuring lasting peace in their
Please, you should be courageous and handle your matter within your
home, no matter the circumstance that surrounds your marriage. Do not
allow any third party to settle your disagreements. This will ruin your
marriage. You shall bear many children in your marriage. In fact, your
first children will be twins in Jesus’ name.”
Today is my day and I never expected this crowd on my wedding day. I
really appreciate everyone who took time out of their schedule to honour
us. It is a wonderful union indeed. This joy is unquantifiable and
there is no day in my life that is as important as this day.”
in life if he had not met Talatu. “My wife is a very loving and caring
woman, incomparable to any other woman. In fact, if I had not married
her, I would have missed a lot of things in life,” he stated.
that although there was joy written on John’s face, she did not hide her
regret. She had told our correspondents that her husband was unwilling
to talk about his HIV status or circumstances of their marriage.
making it possible to witness this day alongside my lovely husband. The
marriage is an act of God. I thank God He has finally joined us together
as husband and wife.
together would continue forever and ever in Jesus’ name. I pray that the
marriage will be a success. I have forgiven him but he cheated me by
hiding the truth that he is HIV positive from me. If he had told me his
HIV status, it’s either I accepted or rejected his marriage proposal.
Although I have forgiven him and accepted my fate, sometimes I wish I
never met him.”
future as she spoke, added that she learnt from the experience and had
taken a bold step to move on with her life whether HIV positive or
drugs for the rest of my life. He even warned me not to tell my family
about my status. I wished that I remained a virgin. I also regret not
using condoms while the courtship lasted.
be fooled. I advise young ladies to be careful. It is better to listen
to wise counsel than bear the consequences of wrong decisions. I have
learnt my lessons,” she said.
of Lagos psychologist, Prof. Oni Fagbohungbe, said hiding ones’ HIV
status from one’s lover was unacceptable and detrimental to such a
in such deceit do so out of fear that if they reveal the truth, their
partners might not agree to marry them.
wrongly by not disclosing his status to his wife, adding that people
like Emmanuel always use the Bible, which preaches forgiveness, to
appeal to their lovers.
should do, Fagbohungbe said, “From the beginning of the human race,
deception to achieve one’s aim has always been a recurring feature. This
is very bad. The consequence of deceit is detrimental.
should count the cost. If the consequence of continuing in such a
relationship outweighs the benefits, I will advise that they opt out.”