COZA…The name sef sounds like one of those “short time” joints. .I
mean, how will someone name his Church COZA?..COZA, if doubled, sounds
coza coza (sharp sharp).
But that is not the issue; COZA has been in the news of late for the
wrong reasons. Just like Kris Okotie’s Household of God’s Church, a
particular Pastor in the Federal Capital Territory Abuja is also hitting
the headlines. His Church has become a beehive of activities,
attracting all the fine babes and upwardly mobile young men in Abuja.Commonwealth of Zion Assembly (What a name) is located right in the Central Area of Abuja.
It is directly behind Nanet Suites .To be specific, the worship centre
is at the Thisday Dome, owned by Media guru Nduka Obiagbena of Thisday
Recently the General overseer of the Church was involved a sexual
scandal involving him and one of his “lovely sister” sorry i mean Church
The lady went on all cylinders to portray the “man of God” as a randy
man who goes after anything on skirt. Infact she said, the Pastor has
tasted the “ozone layer” of practically all the babes in the Church.
Pastor Biodun as he is referred to is a smooth lovely young man in his
40s.His uniqueness and American style mode of worship is attracting the
young and mighty in Abuja like ants after sugar.
Recently, he was said to have also acquired a Rolls Royce like his counterpart at Oregun.
With all these in mind, I made up my mind to hit COZA today for a worship of a lifetime.
My first disappointment on arriving Thisday Dome,COZA place of worship was that they have no parking space.
No vehicle was allowed about 500 meters to the gate. All vehicles were
parked far away from the Church. The road leading to the Church was
barricaded by five different vehicles.
Stationed at the beginning of the road were some fully armed soldiers and some other plain cloth security men.
At the entrance to the compound proper was a bomb scanning machine
(just like the ones at the airports or banks)..You were expected to
empty all metals with you including car keys,phones and Ipads etc.
After walking through the scanning machine, you now walk into the main
hall of Thisday Dome, where you are welcomed by some of the most
beautiful babes I have seen in Abuja. They were all dressed in pink or
is it yellow short gowns .a
They have a smile for everyone, well chosen, spotless skin. Their smiles
were infectious just like that lady in the Maclean television
I fancied one immediately, i clicked her an eye contact and she
responded, but there were so many ‘distracters’ on ground that prevented
me from going for the kill, but i marked her down, i will be back i
I wanted her to usher me inside the Church by herself
but one overzealous one that didn’t catch my fancy jumped in front of
me, wanting to shake my hands, but i ignored her and moved on.
The Church was already in full session when i arrived, it was testimony
time. I met the last testimony by a lady who spoke about how she was
healed after several months of illness.
And as is customary with me, within a second, i scanned the entire seats and made for one empty one beside one beautiful dame.
The usher wanted to move me somewhere else and i refused.
The lady naturally beckoned on me to join her..Smart babe i said to
myself again..Haa, these COZA babes sabi catch man jare. I gave her a
long smile which she replied with one of the best set of teeth i have
ever seen in a long time.
Babes dey Coza abeg, with these type of ladies, why won’t Pastor Biodun
fall a victim. Their looks can seduce any holy creature. They were
beautiful, smart, friendly, open handed, receptive and ready to
I settled down quickly and joined the flow of songs and clapping.
As we sat down, i saw the lady, who i now realized was wearing a very
very short mini skirt, was trying to use a white handkerchief to cover
her open laps which she noticed i was glaring at continuously. She must
have noticed that my gaze could penetrate a fully clothed body.
When she couldn’t stand it any longer, she politely asked me why i was gazing at her laps.
told her there was no need covering such a lovely body with
handkerchief, moreso since she has decided to come to church half
covered, what’s the essence of covering them.
She smiled and told me – that what’s in vogue. That i am a bush man…
in vogue?’ I asked her?..’Does Pastor Biodun support these type of
dressing?!’ i asked her. She said Pastor Biodun has nothing against any
mode of dressing once you are comfortable with it.
I asked her if she was comfortable with what she was wearing and she
said yes. i then went for the kill – ‘remove your handkerchief then and
lets enjoy God’s creation’. She didn’t know what to say.
She asked me if i was a first timer to the Church and i said YES..Her smile broadens again and she let go the cover cloth.
COZA is a very beautiful Church. The choir made of both young men and
women was awesome. They sang like kenery, the stage was well lighted.
The hall was filled to capacity with an overflow.
I was looking out for the controversial Pastor but he was nowhere to be found..The Church is on a 12 days prayer and fasting.
All the female workers in the Church were well selected, a true
reflection of what the lady that accused the Pastor of Sexual harassment
Their skirts were short but not too revealing. At a point, i was now
asking myself why these modern day Pastors take so much delight in going
for young female Church members. How come Pastor Kris Okotie and Pastor
Biodun Fatoyinbo find these damsels very attractive that they easily
forget the words of God.
How come they take so much delight in having canal knowledge of the daughters of eve even if it means ruining their callings.
COZA is not the best of place to be, because the temptation is just too
much. It seems all the beautiful babes in Abuja converged in that place
to seek for things i don’t know.
When it was time for Sermon, a young man mounted the stage.
My disappointment was now complete, it’s obvious today is not going to be my day.
He went on to announce that the Senior Pastor was not around for service
today but that he will be back in the days ahead. He went ahead to
preach on prosperity and joy of giving.
According to him, Ecclesiates Chapter 10:19 stated that “Money
Answereth Everything”, that with money you can get all the good things
of life including cars, women etc..No wonder his Senior Pastor is in the
news for the wrong reasons i muted.
He went on “this year all those of you that are looking for the fruits
of the womb will become pregnant..All those who were into relationship
last year will get married this year. All those that were disappointed
in business will smile this year. blablabla.
The preaching was the same. The audience was the difference.
I was told Pastor Biodun is a powerful dresser..He loves cars and women
to pieces. He is also very generous. According to the lady that sat
beside me, there is no way you will meet Pastor without melting and
“falling for him” even if he doesn’t toast you. The guy fine die, she
After service, i left quickly to look for that babe at the entrance.
She was waiting for me already. I told her that as a new convert to the
Church, i will need more personal home preaching to convince me to
continue coming to Church.
She was more than happy to oblige me. We exchanged numbers, to meet at our Chicken Nkwobi joint later this evening.
I look forward to that wonderful home bible study. I want to learn a
thing or two or even try those stunts that Pastor Biodun Fatoyinbo is
noted for with his female Church members.
Who knows, i may be in for a good time in the presence of the Lord via COZA in the days and weeks ahead.
But I will not rest until i meet Pastor Biodun one on one. Till then, i rest my case.