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Tuesday

Exclusive: Any Man that marries a single mom is lucky | 7 things we learnt from Sumbo Adeoye's 'Before You Do' message for single parents


About seven months ago or thereabout, one of 2face's baby mama and happily married mum of two boys, Sumbo Adeoye, gave a 45 minutes message at her husband's church, Royalty Christian Centre for single parents.

It was indeed a powerful and eye opening message and KFB has finally succeeded in transcribing it...yup, it took that long.


Sumbo did not only address single moms but also single dads.

According to her, one doesn't necessarily become a single parent by engaging in fornication or immorality. Citing four scenarios, she explained that one could become a single parent either by rape,
premarital sex, losing one's spouse or having one's spouse abandon one for greener pastures.

Here are 7 major things Kemi Filani Blog learnt from the message:

1.  Seek God: 

Stop blaming yourself...seek God, ask him for forgiveness (if you defiled the bed by engaging in fornication).

When you seek God, grace will come in.

 Tell God to take away the pain and sorrow from your heart so that you can stop being bitter.

Pain leads to bitterness. Do not waste your pain, sometimes you are in that pain so that you can help others who will  go through that same pain later on.

Sometimes God brings you through this pain so that you can give the message of hope (like I am) doing to others tomorrow and this shows that you have been healed.....

2. Forgive yourself, let go of the guilt.

The child has already happened, you shouldn't always get angry or feel guilty about your past...forgive yourself......and move on....


3. Trust God.

Trust God in all your ways.

I remember when I used to be a single mom, I knew what I wanted. For about five years, my prayer point was God give me a man after your own heart, lord let your will be done, I let go of my choice for the choice you want for me, I let go of everything that I see as picture perfect. I made this my prayer point everyday. I would be like God, I have tried my best I am overwhelmed, there is nothing I can do...when you pray such prayers, make sure you don't have a different expectation because as at the time my answer to the prayers came, it came in form of a pastor, and i am like for real, No oh,I know I was asking for a man but not a Pastor. And then the holy spirit reminded me that you are after a man after my heart and I am giving you David, what else do you want?...and then  I succumbed.

Sometimes we contradict what we are expecting from God..We pray for this but we are expecting something else..I knew where I was coming from and God was saying he wanted a new taste for me and my friends didn't even believe it..sometimes when God does his own things, we can't comprehend it.

Mary in the Bible was dating Joseph and she got pregnant.  Imagine what people of now would have said to Joseph, you better flee from her..you want to father someone else's child...even Joseph's mum too would have said her own too...the society too would have condemned her too, painting her and calling her negative names like wayward girl etc...but God sent Angel Gabriel to tell Joseph to stick with Mary.

I remember when I was a single parent, i was working in a Bank and was comfortable, so I wasn't begging anybody for anything...but one sister came to meet me and said, sister Sumbo you know you are looking for a husband to marry, you better pack your car and always use all this danfo buses as your means of transportation so that you can easily get a man to notice you...they won't notice you easily if you are driving a car oh. Enter bus and stop driving car up and down...the society gives you ridiculous advises....some will say go to clubs...yet you are asking for a man after God's heart.


4. Wait

When you ask God for something, the answer may not come early.

In my own case, i waited for 8 years. The answer may not come quickly because God is trying to re-mold you, to break you, to prepare you so as to ready for the testimony he is about to give you....because if he gives it to you on a platter of gold, you may not appreciate it.

5. Do not be desperate

Take your time. As a single parent, don't rush into a relationship, desperation will make you accept just anything. E.G at 21, as a lady your dream is a tall dark and handsome man...then you turn 25...then 35+ .......you now start saying any man that fears God (whether he has a job or not) is okay for you as long as he can marry you and give you a child...this is desperation...these things happen for real.

I remember the day when my baby daddy proposed to his girlfriend, I was on the list of those that will take praise in church for that Wednesday..well I had known what was going on but it didn't affect me because I had known what I want, so i had let go of that choice for God's will for me...so i came to church, I was leading the Praise session and everyone was just looking at me with pity eyes like 'omo yi o mo nkan ti on sele (this girl doesn't know what's going on o)'....after service, one sister even came to me and said It is well and in my mind, I am like what happened, did somebody die....the person felt i was faking that i wasn''t hurt by the proposal but she and the others didn't know i had been healed by God for my own expected end..so don't be desperate. 

That bobo that you are killing yourself over and putting yourself in strategic places over..may not be God's choice for you.....but if he is God's choice for you like Mary's spouse Joseph in the Bible....God will fix it...he made sure Joseph did not leave Mary so if you are waiting for a Man as a single mum, as long as you trust God enough, he will speak to the Man that will come for you.

Mary was in a complicated issue, not many men would stay but the Almighty jury fought for her because that was the man God had prepared for her....Mary did not have to call anybody to go and beg Joseph to stay, so you don't need to beg any spouse to stay with you because you are  a single parent...


5.  Be positive to receive

Everyone who sees you as single parent will definitely judge you at first even without hearing your story... it is normal, i have been there, i know what i am saying...but don't let that discourage you.....

6. Pray and seek God always

Even if you have seen someone to marry you, don't stop praying constantly....have the word of God in your heart...it helps.


7. Go for counselling
If you are marrying a single mom/dad, you need to go for counseling, because it is not easy...cos you need to love her/him, flaws and kid(s)..and be ready to take up their responsibilities.

Anyone who marries a single mom or dad is very lucky because they have been there or wounded so they will do everything to make it work, they won''t want people to be counting their husbands/wives for them...it is a unique marriage that is not for everybody
Pastor Adeoye, his wife, their sons and Don Moen


 Concluding the message, her hubby, Pastor David Adeoye had this to say to single parents...

"I have the happiest marriage on earth today because i love my wife and our sons....Don't hide your child from your spouse, if they can't love your child with you, then they don't deserve you...."

PDA between Sumbo and Pastor Adeoye sometime ago

24 comments:

  1. May Almighty God continue to uphold you in Jesus name - amen

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  2. Sumbo is just one lucky woman, it is not easy for men to just accept a single woman with a kid not to mention two kids for that matter. Hmm it is well with your home ma.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I agree too. She is luckier than Annie Idibia sef. Being married to a pastor is much better than marrying a musician that will soon go broke.

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    2. She looks way better than Annie shaa...2face married Annie out of pity

      Delete
  3. "
    Anyone who marries a single mom or dad is very lucky because they have been there or wounded so they will do everything to make it work, they won''t want people to be counting their husbands/wives for them...it is a unique marriage that is not for everybody" Na lie jor, it doesn't always work that way, i know single mums that have been married thrice e.g clarion chukwura

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. She's so right! no desparation in life, be yourself and allow God do his thing for every perfect gift comes from above.

      Delete
  4. God bless you for sharing this, you don;t know how much you have touched me with this message.

    ReplyDelete
  5. But i have a question, what happened to the pregnancy she had after she got married to Pastor Adeoye?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I think she has miscarriage.

      Delete
    2. I dont think she was pregnant, it was just fufu that was in the tummy in Toyin Aimakhu's voice, bloggers just assumed she was preggy

      Delete
    3. Gosh cant you all just mind your business?

      Delete



  6. Greetings To You Viewer
    I am Prophet Osagiede Destiny, I render my steward worship with Living Faith Church in Nigeria popularly known as Winner’s Chapel. I have had series of encounter with God, which include seeing Jesus Christ four times in my revelation. Seeing the Holy Spirit appear to me in a bodily form, angels several times, also being to heaven once and hearings from God with authoritative voice, still voice and through my consciousness. God has asked me to pray for his people all across the globe and I am praying for you that is reading it now.

    Whatever captivity that you are into now is destroyed by the power of the Holy Ghost. It might be sickness the Lord is healing you right now, you don’t need to see me just believe it now Luke 7 ; 7 . Every affliction ravaging your system isn’t bareness, broken relationship, poverty lost in business ,job problem, depression, blood pressure low sperm count ,menstruation issue, broken heart by boyfriend and girlfriend harassment

    I therefore decree freedom to every issue of concern in your life

    FOR PRAYER AND COUNCELLING
    Contact:
    E-mail:phrophetosagiededestiny@yahoo.com
    Or
    +2348135969386
    Or
    www.prophetosagiedes.wix.com


    Expect a testimony,……………….. Jesus is Lord

    ReplyDelete
  7. Single parenthood is Not a road I would like to go down on. It is not even something to be proud of But God's strength to those who have found themselves in that situation. E no easy

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  8. A powerful message truly. May the Grace of God continue to make you a source of hope to this generation Sunmbo, you are so kind. I am not a single parent but i know a few of them and i will share this with them

    ReplyDelete
  9. But why do people have that horrible belief that it is always difficult for a lady that is already comfortable and driving a car already to find a man to notice and notice her? So i should not enjoy my life because i want to be seen by a man???

    ReplyDelete
  10. True you have been healed.
    Use the experience to teach young girls not to waka waka like you.

    ReplyDelete
  11. Great tips. I am happy for her.

    ReplyDelete
  12. One truth about life is...."what belongs to you, in due time, you shall reap". Sumbo was never going to have a good life with 2face...that wasn't God's plan for her life. Although she took a detour, but I'm happy she ended up with the right man

    ReplyDelete
  13. God bless Sunmbo and her marriage.

    ReplyDelete

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